Because the rise of women will mean your fall

Because you will be falling from your throne of lordship to a position of equality

Because you will have to get a paid maid now

Because when you say you ‘slept’ with her, it means she ‘slept’ with you too

Because I drink wine. Whatever, Jesus drank wine too

Because we have better men who have long embraced the better life. You can die a caveman if you want.

Because you think liberty and rampant criminality are not mutually exclusive

Because you are a coward

Because even though it’s a man’s world, you are still a boy

Goodbye is traditional

I am not saying that.

Go shit yourself, you smelly misogynist!